I'm not really sure what's bothering me anymore.

I think it's more to do with the fact that I'm not doing anything productive with my holidays (yet). I know holidays should be about relaxing, but right now, this doing nothing is making me feel even more worthless and hopeless than I already feel. Can't believe I'm saying this, but I kinda miss school. And hall. At least there are things to do in school. At home, I just feel utterly USELESS. And that's not a good feeling for someone trying to use the holidays to feel better about herself.

Ugh. I need to find the motivation to get off my arse and do something with my holidays. Motivation, strike me please.